Back From The Past
by purpleducki88
Summary: Harry's parents come to Hogwarts in his seventh year, that's fine. But what about his children? HarryGinny, RonHermione, LilyJames. Rated T for mild romance andor language.
1. Why are you on my bed?

A 17 year old Harry Potter sat with his legs stretched out in front of him on his four poster bed at Hogwarts, talking to his best friend of almost seven years, Ron Weasely. They had discussed various things that day; though they flitted from one subject to another, they hadn't talked about the one thing that was weighing down both of their hearts lately.

Women.

Not just any women, though. For Harry, it was Ginny Weasely, who just happened to be Ron's little sister. He loved her so much, and he knew she felt the same way. Unfortunately for Harry, at the end of the last year, he had broken up with her. What with Voldemort trying to kill him, and a war going on, he didn't want anything at all to her; especially not Voldemort himself. And so, he had broken up with her, even though this was the time that he desperately needed her most. If only he would figure it out on his own, they would be together again, this time permanently.

And, of course, for Ron, it was their mutual other best friend, Hermione Granger. It had been pain fully obvious that he was head over heels for her ever since their first year, and she eventually felt the same for the lovable village idiot of the Trio. The only problem was the fact that neither of them had enough courage to tell the other of their feelings; in fact, they were the only two people in the school who hadn't a clue about the other's feelings. But anyway, enough back round. On with the plot!

As a lull formed in the conversation, Harry knew that they had been tiptoeing around the girls all day, and decided to bring them up.

"So…" He began.

"So…" Ron replied.

"Okay, so I've been thinking," Harry stated, "And, well…maybeIshouldn'thavebrokenupwithGinny." He mumbled the last part together as he looked away, embarrassed about making such a personal statement.

Ron looked at him for a few seconds, then yelled, "Bloody hell! 'Mione and I thought you'd never come to your senses and get back with her!" He paused then muttered under his breath, "She owes me four sickles and a knut. Score."

Harry looked back at him, surprised. "You were betting on when we would get back together?"

"Nah, just how long it would take you. I bet a summer with your relatives, and Hermione bet a year or two. Thanks for that, Harry. You just made me a little bit richer!"

Harry smirked and rolled his eyes but replied, "Anytime, mate."

Now a more comfortable silence filled the room. Harry was now wondering about his friend's own relationship problems, but knew not to push him.

"Well, I'm going to go talk to Ginny," said Harry, after a considerable amount of time had passed. As he pulled his legs to him in preparation to get off of the bed, a large BANG filled the room. Ron and Harry jumped back on their respective beds; a cloud of smoke had appeared where Harry's legs where only seconds before. To figures appeared at the end of his bed. They seemed to be wrestling, or something else…

As the smoke cleared, they could make out a boy and a girl, roughly their age, and snogging passionately. They didn't even notice the two bewildered teenage boys watching them with shock, until both ran out of breath.

They both looked up at each other and whispered, "Wow…"

The boy then said, "If that doesn't prove that we're meant to be together, then I don't know what will, Evans."

Harry raised his eyebrows at the last statement. Evans was his mother's maiden name. His dead mother's maiden name, at that.

The girl replied, "Well, maybe, just maybe, in some strange way, you could be right, Potter."

Harry's eyebrows shot up even higher. He glanced sideways at Ron. Ron was wearing an expression that mirrored Harry's exactly. Both boys suppressed a small chuckle.

The two strangers, finally realizing the two boys were there, scrambled off of each other, clearly embarrassed. After a moment of silence, the boy spoke.

"Hey, you're not Sirius and Remus!"


	2. What should have been done in last book

**(A/N OMG! You guys are the nicest!!! I love both of my reviews, and I finally know why people are always like, "REVIEW OR ELSE!!!!" I now know that getting a review makes you feel all fuzzy inside-like Zac Efron just hugged you…happy thoughts :D! Ok, I'll let you read now. BYE! I LOVE YOU ALL! REVIEW OR ELSE:P)**

Ron looked at him and replied, "No duh…" rolling his eyes.

"Um, excuse me? Would anyone mind telling me what two strangers are doing in our bedroom?" interjected Harry.

"Yes, well, I was just about to ask the same thing. Who are you?" said the girl.

As Harry's brain stopped reeling from shock, he started to notice that the two newcomers looked an awful lot like his parents. The boy was a carbon copy of himself, but with hazel eyes. The girl was a bit shorter than the boy's 5ft 6in, with wavy red hair not unlike the Weasleys', and with strikingly beautiful green eyes. Now, if only he could verify that the odd pair was his parents…

The boy pointed to himself, and said, "I'm James Potter, and this is Lily Evans. Who are you people?"

Harry looked at Ron, astonished. Ron stuttered, "I-I'm Ron Weasley. T-That's Harry-"

"But you don't need to know my last name," Harry interrupted, trying to signal Ron to shut up, "Do you now what day it is?" He was sweating by now. This would be the test, this would tell him if these really were his parents.

"It's September 16, 1977. Why?" replied Lily. She had noticed Harry's strange resemblance to James, and now witnessed his jaw drop to the floor in amazement. "Are you alright?"

"Um, sorry, it's just that today is the 16th of September, but, um…the year is…"

"1997!" yelled Ron, "Bloody hell, Harry! First your revelation about Ginny, then you forget what year it is," Harry glared at Ron, but he just kept going, "You are having one hell'uva day, mate…"

Ron trailed off, still shaking his head at Harry's strange life, "Are you done?" Harry asked, "'Cuz if you are, we can maybe try to learn why they're here…?"

He too trailed off, both boys looking at Lily and James for an explanation. Just as James opened his mouth to answer, another large BANG filled the room. This time, though, there was no smoke, just a very angry Hermione Granger standing in the doorway, looking livid.

"RONALD ARTHUR WEASELY!!! SOME OF US ARE TRYING TO STUDY, SO IF YOU ARE DONE YELLING THE YEAR LOUD ENOUGH FOR EVERYONE IN THE CASTLE TO HEAR, _WOULD YOU MIND SHUTTING UP?!?!?!_" Hermione then noticed a very surprised Harry, and said, "Oh, Harry, hello. Have you done your Potions essay yet? It's due next period," Harry was about to say something when she sighed and said, "Oh, why do I even ask? I know you didn't do it, so you're going to want to copy mine, and I'll let you because I'm a good friend who knows that Slughorn will never even notice that they're the same because he loves you, so…"

Trailing off, she finally noticed Lily and James, mirroring Harry's shocked expression, though James smiled a little and said, "Well, that's quite useful…Lily, you want to do my homework?"

"Shut up, James," was the only reply he got.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't notice you guys had visitors. I'll go now," she made to leave, but the turned back and said, "Oh, by the way, Harry, Ginny wants to talk to you. She said something about getting back together…?" she finished hopefully.

"Ginny?" Harry immediately perked up, "Ron, I'll see you later. I've gotta go talk to Ginny!" Harry bounded past Hermione and rushed down the stairs, sliding down the handrail, really. He had the stupidest grin on his face the whole time, which he probably didn't even realize.

Ron realized he was alone in the room with Harry's confused, teenaged parents. "Well, we should probably go watch, this should be interesting…"

They walked down the stairs, nearly bumping into Harry, who was searching the room for Ginny, looking frazzled and running his hand through his hair. He turned around and saw who it was. "She's not here," he whimpered, giving all three puppy dog eyes. "She's … not … here…" He looked at his feet and started to drag himself back up the stairs.

"What in the name of Merlin's saggy you-know-what are you talking about, Harry? She's right there!" Ron smacked the back of Harry's head, and pointed to the foot of the stairs to the girl's dormitories, where a very dejected looking Ginny indeed stood, and apparently Hermione was telling her something along the lines of what Ron had just pointed out to Harry.

Harry looked over and locked eyes with her immediately. They both ran at each other and stopped in the middle of the room, looking at each other with huge, loving eyes.

For a moment, neither said a word, simply drinking in the sight of each other. Finally, Harry broke the comfortable silence and said, "Ginny, I-

"Shh. I know," she interrupted, "Me too." Harry then put his hands on her hips and leaned in, stooping over a bit to reach her. Ginny put her hands on his shoulders, and leaned in as well. As they got closer and closer, the whole room seemed to quiet, until the only sounds they could hear were of the whooshing wind at the window. Finally, their lips crashed into each other, and both knew they would never love another person as much as the other, except perhaps the children they knew they would have **(A/N Thank fully, none of which will be named Hugo…) **, together.

They kissed for a full minute before pulling away, eyes round with joy, and Harry then pulled her into a bone-crushing hug. "Ginny, I love you so much…I'll never leave you again; I promise," said Harry. He meant every word, and both knew it. Ginny looked up into his green eyes and said, "Harry, I love you too, but I'm a big girl, and I can stand up for myself." She half-smiled at him, hoping he would understand why she was telling him this now, and why she hadn't when they had first broken up.

"I know, Ginny. And I hear you cast a mean bat boogey hex, too" Both giggled, or chuckled, in Harry's case (giggling just isn't manly), and Ginny said, "Well, whoever told you that must be the best boyfriend I ever had, and deserves a massive snog for being so nice."

"Well, I'm sure my source wouldn't be too opposed to that…" Harry said, while feigning deep thought, "Let me check his time table, but I'm sure he has an opening for that…right about now!"

"Ew! I don't want to watch my best mate and my little sister snog in front of the whole house! Don't you have any self-respect?" yelled Ron.

"Oh, this coming from the boy who snogged his girlfriend in the Great Hall nearly every morning last year…" replied Ginny.

"Yeah, well, … um, that's, um… I just remembered that I need to see McGonagall!" said Ron, glad to find a reason to leave the now-awkward conversation. For him, at least. Harry and Ginny were now both fighting back laughter as Ron squirmed beneath their gazes.

"Why?" said Harry, "Don't tell me you need to owl you mom, either, because I see no reason why she should know of this…that would just be too weird…" he shuddered as Ron answered, "Hello?!?! We have to get these two back to…wherever they came from."

"It seems like they came from the past, or something…So we have to get them…BACK TO THE PAST!" Harry said, thrusting his index finger into the air, with a determined look on his face.

**(Alright! Longest chapter yet! Three whole pages on Word, though it only covers a few minutes. Whatev. I like it better than the first one. I wouldn't expect the third one for a business week or so. I haven't even started it yet… Anyway, review and I will love you fo-ev-ah! WHEE! I'm on page four now!!!! Hello, Pagefourlandia!!!!**

… **Sorry. It's like midnight, and my brain is sorted being sucked drying by writing this A/N, so I'm a little…(makes whooshy moves with hands), um, yeah. I'm a little WHOOO! right now, sooooooo yeah. SEE YOU LUVERLY PEOPLE LATER, I NEED SLEEP OR I WILL SOON SELF-DESTRUCT. BYE!!!!!)**


	3. Screw being in character!

**(A/N: Okay, so last chapter, Harry and Ginny got back together, Ron was majorly grossed out, and Harry and Ron decided that they needed to get Lily and James…BACK TO THE PAST!!!! And now, luverly readers, I will see where this plot bunny takes me…)** **(P.S. Also, fank you to mah wonderful friend/beta, Pixelated Pancakes, for betaing this chapter for me. Yes, I know that it is almost a crackfic, but hey...Ok, I'll shut up now...)**

There was a brief silence in which Harry stood with his finger in the air, panting and still looking determined, although he was starting to resemble a constipated old man. EW! Ok, never mind. Scratch that last part. TMI.

Lily and James burst out laughing a few seconds later. Harry looked at them seriously and said, "What? Is there something on my face?" which only made them laugh harder.

A few minutes later, they were on their way to the Headmistresses' office with James and Lily quietly giggling under the cloak, Harry and Ginny happily holding hands, and Ron and Hermione looking jealously (secretly, of course!) at the happy couples.

After a few minutes, Ron and Hermione noticed an uncomfortable silence which was threatening to suffocate them.

"Erm, so… hi, Hermione," Ron started, shifting his gaze awkwardly.

"Yes, hello, Ronald. Although, for future reference, most people say hello when they first see a person, not almost half an hour later," Hermione replied, looking at Ron with one eyebrow cocked up in amusement.

"Well, um, I'm not like other people?"

"Indeed, Ron, we all know how special you are. I would just appreciate it greatly if you used that big, squishy thing in your head called a brain when you talk to me. I'm pretty sure there is one up there, though under recent circumstances, I'm beginning to doubt it."

"Hey! That's mean…you meanie!" **(A/N: A little OOC, I know, but I couldn't resist. :P)**

"Whatever you say, Ron, whatever you say…" Hermione replied, shaking her head. Just as Ron was about to reply with one of his increasingly stupid comebacks, they reached the gargoyles that were guarding the Headmistresses' office. "Thank God…" muttered Hermione as they moved forward with Ron to give the door the password.

Now, refocusing on Lily and James, Lily had been explaining to James that she thought that he and Harry were related.

"Hold up, you think me and Mr. Mushy-gushy over there are related? No frickin' way. That guy's a wuss. No way would he and I share family. Seriously? I am still in denial that we share the same air space," he replied.

"Germanium's Oblongular Triangle Pops," Hermione and Ron yelled at the gargoyle. As it leaped aside, James muttered to Lily, "Ah, well, at least that hasn't changed. That's the same password from last week!"

They entered the room to find a very orderly Minerva McGonagall sitting at the desk. Lily and James traded looks. What happened to Dumbledore?

"Yes, Mr. Potter? You said you needed to speak to me?" she said, startling James. He was about to respond when Harry replied, "Yes, Professor. You see, we have a bit of a problem…" He then turned around and yanked the cloak off of the pair of time travelers, only to reveal a confused looking James, and a pleased Lily wearing one of those 'What-did-I-tell-you?' expressions.

"OH MY GOD! IS THAT LILY EVANS AND JAMES POTTER I SEE BEFORE ME?!!?!?!?!?!" McGonagall yelled, grabbing her head and backing away.

After a moment, James said, "Nice to see you too, Minnie."

"Erm, well… we think so."

McGonagall looked at Harry and realized what this meant to him. "Oh, Harry. This must mean so much to you…"

"Yeah," said Harry, clearing his throat and looking down. "It does…"

An awkward moment passed, in which Lily and James looked at Harry confusedly, and everybody else looked with pity at a clearly embarrassed Harry.

"Oh, btw, Harry, I heard about you and Ginny. OMG! Idk what would have happened if u had been apart longer…SQUEE!" McGonagall talked like a n00b for a few more minutes before stating that she "g2g," but she would "ttyl." She flounced out of the room leaving many confused teenagers in her wake.

"What the bloody hell was she saying?!!??! Are those some sort of new runes we're supposed to know?!?!" said James.

**(A/N: Okay, so not as long. Yes, I am quite aware that McGonagall was extremely OCC. I just couldn't resist. I never said I wasn't going to poke fun at the characters. I just won't be including Draco because he's stinky, although Snape might pop up so James can beat him up, or something… smarmy b-tard deserves it, too…)  
**


	4. Oxymoron: a filler with plot

**(A/N Ok, I'm posting, even though you peoples have been supra-meanie and have not reviewed, like, AT ALL. (Although, thankies to those who did. You get, erm, a Zac Efron doll ******** ) So, even though all yalls don't deserve it, I'm gunna update. BUT YOU BETTER REVIEW OR I WILL KEEP THIS STORY IN MAH HEAD, AND NOBODY WILL EVER KNOW JUST WHAT HAPPENED. EVER. SO, YEAH.**

**OH, and I keep forgetting this soo…to quote from my one shot…**

"**I also don't own HP and any affiliations or references to/from it. BUT NEITHER DO YOU, SO THERE!!!!!"**

**Dokay, so here goes. Imma make it all up on the spot, so be prepared for some real weird shit up in the Hogwartz-izzle.)**

Ok, so now they're sitting in McGonagall's office after herding her back in to explain a few things. Like, you know, how they got there. They had sort of figured it had something to do with love. You know, cause James and Lily were snogging for the first time at the same time as Harry had realized that he loved Ginny, sending James and Lily somehow into the future. Everyone was still a little confuzzled. At least, Ron was.

"I'm confuzzled," said Ron, breaking the silence.

"Oh, shut it, will you? We're all tired and confuzzled and hungry and-"

"LUNCH!"

"What?" said Harry, angry at being interrupted.

"It's lunch time, Harry!" Ron was bouncing in his seat like a two year old. "Yay!!!" He got up and did a triple.

_Now THAT's impressive,_ thought Hermione, _I didn't know he danced._

_WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!_ thought Ron.

Back in the common room (after a trip to the kitchens) every one was sitting in front of the fire, as the fall evening was quickly turning chillier. Harry stole glances at his parents and waited for the question. It inevitable; they knew they were twenty years in the future at least; they had to guess that he was at least related to James, if not Lily.

"So, Harry…" Lily started, "I was wondering…"

_Here it comes,_ he thought. "About what?"

"Well, it's just that, well, you and James look so similar, and…I was wondering if you were his son."

Harry looked into her eyes and knew he could trust her. She was his mother, after all. Even if she was a few years younger. He nodded slowly and replied, "Yes. But you'll have to figure out my mother for yourself." He got up to walk away, feeling a headache coming on.

"Wait, Harry!" Lily followed him and said, "Am I your mom?"

**[A/N: There. That's all you mean people get. And THAT'S why you should review. (turns and walks away angrily in high heels)**


	5. The one with more notes than story

**(A/N: Ok, so I am in the process of forgiving you guys. I mean, all that groveling my beta did is really paying off. Keep up the good work, Elly! So, I am now only half as mad as before. Thankies:D Plus, I just wanted to see if anybody had some ideas on what to do for chapter six. Sadly, this 'making stuff up' thing doesn't seem to be going as well as before. But, you know. Something will hit me eventually. I hope. I also hope that it will not be my mother which is hitting me for not doing my term paper right now. Oh well, at least my readers will be happy (bursts into tears) I LOVE YOU GUYS! (glomps reviewers) So, yeah. Here's chapter five. Maybe I'm just being mushy, but this is a muy importante chapter. Very serious, Lily learns many things…)**

Harry stopped dead in his tracks. He turned to see a concerned looking Lily halfway up the stairs to the boy's rooms, where he stood at the door. He didn't reply but simply looked at her. To Lily, the look conveyed all the information she needed. She ran up the stairs and enveloped him in the biggest best hug he had ever had. A mother's hug. Something that most people took for granted, but Harry had always yearned for. He hugged her back, tears spilling from his eyes. He knew it wasn't manly, but he didn't give a crap at this point. He was through with being manly by now. Everyone is allowed to cry in front of their mother.

After a few minutes, Harry stepped back and wiped his eyes, chuckling a little. They both walked into his bedroom and sat on his bed. Lily fingered the sheets and said, "You know, this was James' bed. I wonder how he feels, now that he knows his son has it…" Both smiled, enjoying the moment. Suddenly, her face turned soft, yet serious. "Harry," she delicately, "What happened to us?"

Harry looked up and smiled at her. "You know I can't tell you that," he said, both crying by now, "That would mess up the future as I know it."

"How? I can tell something bad happened, Harry. You can tell me," she covered his hand with hers, "You can trust me."

So, Harry paused for a moment then said, "Ok." He told her everything that happened in his life so far. She was full-on crying by the end of the first two years of his life, often interrupting him by swearing very well and loudly at her sister. Ginny came in around his fifth year, and sat down next him, taking his hand and smiling at him as he got to the part in the Department of Mysteries. He was breathing rather shakily, and more tears poured from all three as he explained Sirius' death. For the last two years, Ginny added details where he forgot, often silly or stupid things which made all three laugh. When they reached parts concerning his past/present relationships, Harry blushed a lot, but continued the story of his life.

When he told her of his defeat of Voldemort over the summer, **(See A/N at bottom) **she gasped and cried even harder than before, and when he her of present times, she smiled.

"Harry, I don't think a mother has ever been as proud of her son as I am of you right now," she said, still smiling, tears dripping from her face. "I am so happy."

"I'm glad you think so…Mum." He absolutely grinned, "You know, I've never been able to call anybody mum before…" He paused. "It feels absolutely wonderful."

Both got up and hugged, Ginny looking on while wearing a calm, happy smile. They all went down the common room, to find Hermione, Ron, and James in time for dinner. They would have a feast in their dorm room, they decided. It had already been decided by McGonagall that Lily and James would stay in the Room of Requirement until further notice, seeing as how they had no where else to sleep. They would also skip classes and all meals with the rest of the school. The trio had decided this one. People would wonder about transfer students in the middle of September.

**(A/N: Ok, you reviewers may have gotten better, but I am a review dictator. REVIEW!**

**Also, please no flames. I have a gentle soul, which is hurt easily by insults (trys to look gentle; fails miserably). In addition, please no strange reviews. I recently got one on my oneshot complaining about how HORRIBLE oneshots usually are, and I'm not sure if it's a compliment or an insult, but it sure got me confuzzled. So, please, review with a point.**

**Also, while writing this, I decided that in my story, they defeated Voldie-shorts over the summer before their seventh year. I just don't DO violence (hush, Elly!), and that seems a little, well, violent. It's just the same as in the book, but a bit earlier. :D Okie dokie! Thanks for reading, and I'm sorry it was so short. I just felt like I needed at least one serious chapter, and I didn't really want to focus on serious things for too long anyway. Serious things make me feel sad. Especially a certain Siriusly sad incedent in the fifth book. (haha, fifth chapter, fifth book, haha)**

**Ok, bye until next time! (waves) BYE!)**


	6. Having a party!

**(A/N:Oak-dee-dok! Now that I am back from the B.S. of camping (literally XP), it is time for another installment of this story, the sixth chapter. This, I'm hoping won't turn out as gushy or serious (everyone is reminded of puns and groans) as the last. Of course, nobody will really know SINCE NONE OF YOU GAVE ME IDEAS! But, alas, I have an imagination. And it's like I always (well, not always, just this one time…) say, 'When in doubt, poop jokes out!' So, be warned, there may be a few. Especially from James.**

**And everybody else.**

**So anyway, enough chitter-chatter! Here's chapter 6!)**

Harry loved being serious just as much as the next person, but there was only so much he could take. Hermione was frantically studying for the next pop quiz in Ancient Runes, Neville was helping Luna with a 7 foot long essay for Divination, and even Ron was doing a bit of studying, looking over Hermione's History of Magic notes. Harry sat next in the midst of all of them, looking alternately at his friends and the pen he was tapping frantically as if waiting for one or both to explode.

After about half an hour of this, Harry, it turned out, was the one to explode.

"DON'T YOU BLOODY PEOPLE EVER STOP STUDYING?!?!?!??!?!??!?!?!"

All four whipped their heads up at him; consequently, they all got a temporary case of whiplash on the process. As Ron, Hermione, Neville, and Luna rubbed their necks while managing to look at Harry like he was crazy, James and Lily entered the near empty common room. Harry rounded on them.

"AND YOU!!! DON'T YOU HAVE ANYTHING TO STUDY FOR?????"

Luckily, Ginny also entered at this point, took one look at Harry, and stated, "He missed his quiet time." **(A/N: See chapter two of When You're Dead)**

It wasn't a question; it was a fact. Ginny gently crept up behind him and said soothingly in a soft, singsong voice, "Hey, Harry, want to go on a walk with me? It might make you feel better."

Harry, still visibly seething, nodded slowly and followed Ginny through the portrait of the fat lady as if in a daze. Which he probably was.

A few hours and several trips around the lake later, Harry was semi-normal once again. As he and Ginny made their way up to the castle, Harry asked Ginny what she thought of having some sort of party tonight, just for the hell'o it. Maybe they would play some party games, bust out his stash of explosives, get drunk for no reason and wake up somewhere outside…you know, fun party stuff.

Once everyone in the Gryffindor common room had been rounded up and told the plan, everyone agreed and thought it would be a real kick-ass party. Oh, how wrong they were.

**(A/N: dun dun DUN! Oh, the shame. I have commited a cliffie! (weeps) BAD AUTHORESS! BAD! I'm going to go give myself a piece of my mind. The nerve of some people…**

**Anywho, that was chapter 6! I'm planning for them to go back some time in the near future OR something else…something…MYSTERIOUS. (Does 'level six wizard!' hands) Ooh, MYSTERIOUS. You guys KNOW it's gonna be good when it's MYSTERIOUS in all caps. (crowd oohs, aahs, and farts) Yeah, so anyway…Please review and tell me what you want:**

**a. a clear-cut sad, weepy ending where Lily and James go back**

**b. a MYSTERIOUS occurrence during the party involving all of the marauders (Except Peter) (Aww, crap. I'm pretty sure that just gave it away…)**

**OR c. SoMe QuIeT tImE!1!1!1!1 (LOL)**

**Seriously. Vote or die. As a bonus, everyone who votes and doesn't say "UpDaTe SoOn!!!!eleven!!!" (which I have been occasionally guilty of…) get brownie points-ER, a MYSTERIOUS prize. So MYSTERIOUS, in fact, that even**_** I**_** don't know what it is. ;P **

**GAH!!! I just remembered that I promised poop jokes! Sorry 'bout that, I promise there'll be a few later on…**

**Ok. C U NEXT TIME!!!)**


	7. Trying to get a little bit TIIIIPSEEEY

**(A/N: This chapter should be pretty big, seeing as it is the big party. Of course, it could also not. Whatev. Here we go.)**

"JAMES! Will you shut it already?!?!?!?!?!"

James was giddy with anticipation, and his giggling and talking was getting on Lily's nerves. She loved him, yet, at the same time, she loathed him. Would he EVER shut up?

Harry amplified his voice and said, "Ok, everybody. As you will notice (if you haven't already) the common room is decorated because we're having a party FOR NO REAL REASON!"

The entire room burst into cheers; the DJ (Romilda Vane) turned on a song by Fall Out Boy (Tnks Fr Th Mmrs) **(A/N: see bottom)**, and everybody started to jam. For the rest of the night, until about 5, everyone danced.

After the last five hours of dancing, everyone was pretty tired. So, they decided to play some sorta party games.

"So," said Ginny, sweating profusely, "What does everyone want to play?"

"Ooh, Spin the Bottle!" said Ron.

"Ron, you're just saying that because you want an excuse to snog Hermione's face off." Harry looked accusingly at Ron. Luckily, Hermione was in the bathroom at the moment.

"So…?"

"Hey, I have an idea. Why don't we mix the game with…like, seven minutes in heaven, or something?" This came from Neville, surprisingly. He was stealing periodic glances at Luna as he announced his idea. Ooh, I wonder why? (This, children, is called _sarcasm_. Now, say it with me! _Sarcasm. _(Assorted small children yell "SAWCADEM!!!!))

"Whatever. Let's just play the game, already."

And so, they began the game. James and Lily where nowhere to be found. (Nowherea broom closet) It was Harry's turn first; as the bottle spun quickly on its side, he shot a quick charm at the bottle. Now it would land on Ginny every time he touched it.

I wonder who it landed on?

Seven minutes later, Harry and Ginny came out of a nearby broom closet, giggly madly and looking at each other in a very suggestive manner. Ron looked at Harry and shot him a look that said "If that was any other girl, I'd what to know what went on in there. Because it's my sister, I'm gonna kick your ass and THEN ask what went on in there."

They took their places back, and it was now Ron's turn. The bottle landed on….

The big BOOM that came from behind where Hermione was seated!!!

Everyone stuggled to their feet and pulled out their wands. (I say 'struggled', as they were pretty drunk at this point. XP )

There was smoke, and it almost immediately cleared to reveal two very confused looking seventeen year olds.

After a moment Harry finally registered who they were and said, "WHAT THE HELL??!?!?!?"

The taller of the two boys, who had black hair and probably brownish eyes, flashed a suave, cocky smile at Harry and said, "What, forgot all about us, Prongsie?"

Harry looked a little bewildered and said, "Sirius? Remus?? How did you get here???"

"Well, man, you know how we do." Sirius assumed a gangster-like position and looked at Harry like he was so cool and it was so obvious.

"Er, Sirius?" interrupted a nervous looking Remus, "I don't think that's James."

"What are you, Moony? Blind? This is Prongs right here. I mean, his eyes look a little different, and there's guy who looks suspiciously like him coming through the portrait hole yelling, 'MOONY!!! PADFOOT!!!', but that doesn't mean that he's not-"

He was never able to finish that horrendous run-on sentence, for just then the real James mauled him and Remus, throwing all three boys to the ground.

Everybody was pretty much confused by this new turn of events, what with all the 'not really dead any more' people, and, thanks to Harry, because everyone was really pretty badly hammered at this point. The BOOM had disoriented them, and most people decided to go to bed before anything else happened to make their impending hangovers worse.

Of course, they weren't the only ones who heard the explosion. Seconds after Lily had managed to drag a mock-weeping James off of Remus and Sirius, ("My dear, dear friends! I thought I should never see your bright and smiling faces once more!") an extremely annoyed Snape swept into the common room, followed by an even-more-annoyed McGonagall.

"What in the world is all this ruckus!" Snape called out in his pinched, drawling voice.

"Ah, Snivellous, Minnie! So nice of you to join us," Sirius grinned mischievously at Snape and McGonagall, who were extremely confused, "Just in time to help us finish up or annual…er…tea party! To support the…house elves!" At this point, Sirius' grin was faltering a bit, until Hermione saved him with an interesting lie about how S.P.E.W. put one on every year, and everyone was invited.

"I guess the invitations got lost in the mail, somehow, because an awful lot of people from Finland attended this year," she finished, pretending to look rather confused, which wasn't hard, as she already was (albeit for different reasons.)

"See, Severus? Nothing to worry about. Just a tea party. Let's just leave these kids in peace…" McGonagall was desperately trying to pull Snape out of the Gryffindor common room. She failed miserably. It was easy to tell that she was trying to ignore the presence of the Marauders; she obviously hadn't mentioned James and Lily's presence to Snape, and she figured she could question them about Sirius and Remus later.

"Wait," said Snape, making McGonagall wince and turn towards him, knowing that she was going to have some sirius hell to pay from the greasy git.

"You know, it's funny what you remember of your childhood as an adult," Severus started to pace slowly up and down the room keeping his eyes fixed squarely on the Marauders. "Many people remember their birthday parties, their Christmases, their Halloweens…" He turned sharply and stalked up to Sirius, getting all up in his grill, "You know what I remember, BLACK?" He turned to Remus' calm face, getting so close he could feel the now-dead man breathing steadily on his face. "What about you LUPIN? Any guesses? You always were the smartest of the group…" He rounded upon James now, a glint of danger in his eyes. "Ahh, Mr. POTTER. I would ask you to guess, as well. But you are the source of this, my worst memory, which shall haunt me forever and a day." He lingered a moment on James' defiant expression, something he had seen on both Potter men's faces more than a few times.

"It all started when I made up that spell. What was it called? Ah yes, …"

**(A/N: What great temerity! I have commited yet ANOTHER cliffie! I know, I know. Everyone thought they were all gonna die, or something. But this is SOOOOO much better, no? All our favorite mischief makers, back together! (excluding Fred + George) (Ooh, Peter got BURNED!) As you can tell, most people said B. Everyone who voted got cookies, even though most of them said something to the extent of "UpDaTe SoOn!!!!!111!!!!eleven!!!" But I know 'twas all in good fun. Also, I KNOW that that FOB song didn't come out until this year, but…I really love it!!! So, to all who scorn me for song choice? AH FART IN YOUR GEHNERAL DEERECTION! See you later! I should have Ch 8 out soon, seeing as we have many holidays coming up soon.)**


	8. Letter du Fail Epique

Dear my lovely readers,

Due to my extreme Emo-ness as of late, I will not be writing new chapters of this story or any of my others until this stage passes. If it is any indication, I have taken to wearing a black choker almost 24/7, and am contemplating painting my nails black. To all new readers, I hope you enjoy this story and my others, and am extremely sorry that this is not the next chapter as you had perceived it to be. That goes to old readers, also, although the total amount of old readers (according to my reviews) is about 3. Please, please, review. When I stop being so emo, here are a few this you can expect from me:

A fluffy Neville/Luna oneshot (ok, now do you see why I must not be emo for the writing process? Fluffy onesies don't work when they're emo.)

The eighth chapter of Back From the Past

The fourth chapter of When You're Dead

The second chapter of Operation Find…

And probably another kind of oneshot, because my main wish is to have a fluffy oneshot for each of my favorite pairings before going on to actual stories.

So, I once again apologize, and hope you can somehow find it in your (collective) hearts to forgive me for this terrible wrong I have done you all.

Love,

Purpleducki88


	9. We return to regularly scheduled program

"...Levicorpus. The upside-down spell. Ever since I first used it on Filch's nasty cat, the whole school became obsessed with it. Never once did I think that someone would use it on me. Me, Severus Snape, the Half Blood Prince, the inventor of the spell!" Snape was sweating a bit bot becoming caught up in his rant.

"Erm, Snivelly? If you wouldn't mind getting your greasy arse outta here, we have a party to finish. We could even help you, if you need it," said Sirius, grinning evilly.

But Snape's smile out-eviled his by quite a bit. "Oh, but Mr. Black, you are a student now, and I am a teacher. And I say that comment cost you about...three hundred points."

Harry, who had stayed quiet until now, burst out, "But, Professor, that's how much we won at the last match, it'll take ages to win them all ba-"

"Mr. Potter, that will be fifty more points."

"Now, Severus, this is my house, and I will not allow you take away tons of points willy-nilly! I award Gryffindor it's three hundred and fifty points back."

Snape glared at her. "Three-fifty from Gryffindor."

McGonagall glared right back. "So that's how you wanna play it, beeyatch? Alright, three-fifty from Slytherin."

"Four hundred from Gryffindor!"

"Five hundred from Slthytherin!"

"SIX HUNDRED FROM GRYFFINDOR!"

"ONE THOUSAND FROM SLTHERIN!!!"

"ONE MILLION-"

"TWO MILLION-"

"STFU, YOU GUYS! JUST GIVE US BACK OUR DAMNED POINTS AND TAKE THIS LOVER'S QUARREL ELSEWHERE!"

Everyone looked around, surprised to find Hermione standing there, obviously surprised at herself, also.

It was a moment before anyone could say anything, but Ron broke the silence.

"That's hot."

**(A/N: Hiya guys!!! I know this was super short, and I'm super sorry, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm back and that Ron is still OOC! YAY!**

**And, if you think this is mine/don't review, I'll set crackfic Draco on you!**

**DRACO: KK:Has another baby:**


	10. Sleeping off the partay

"Wait…what

"Wait…what?" Hermione interrupted the silence.

Ron looked shocked, eyes darting between Hermione and the arbitrary mouth that had released his feelings.

"That's…that was…hot. You're so beautiful when you tell people to STFU," Ron stated, a slight redness rising in the tips his ears.

"Ronald," Hermione said, smiling, "I didn't know you felt that way-"

"YEAHWELLTHERESTOFUSDID-"

"STFU, HARRY. –and I would be honored to be your girlfriend." Hermione looked down, blushing a little, "That is, if you'll have me…" She glanced up to find a grinning Ron.

"R U SERIOUS!! Of course I'll have you! I'll never want anyone-" he glanced at Lavender Brown, "-else."

"HUFF!" huffed Lavender, storming out of the room. "STORM!"

"Does she always say her actions out loud?" whispered Sirius.

"Yeah," said Ron, hearing him, "It got really awkward when we were going out, hearing her go, 'SNOG, SNOG, GROPE!' every few minutes."

"Yeah, I can imagine that would ruin any sort of 'mood' you're going for." James chimed in, stuffing his hands in his pockets and glancing at Lily.

"Yep," said Ron, hands in pockets, standing next to James.

"Yep," said James.

"Yep," said Sirius, on the other side of James, mirroring the other two.

"O HAI GUIZ!" yelled Harry.

SILENCE.

"What," said Harry, "I like breaking the mold."

"Obviously…" Ginny muttered.

NEXT DAY

Ginny woke up the next morning to a startling sight in the common room. She had sorta - kinda passed out on the floor after the super party last night. She turned on the uncomfortable floor, wishing she was in her bed, mayhaps with a certain black-haired saviour…

"GLEAM!" gleam some light nearby. "BIG SHINEY GLEAM IN YOUR EYE-BOOGIE FILLED EYES!"

"_Gawd,"_ thought Ginny, _"Not more stupid people. I just hope this time it's not Snape or Luicious…"_

A flash of red hair, and Ginny felt a pair of skinny arms surround her waist.

"Mommy?"

Ginny's eyes popped open. "Whaaaaaaaaaat?"

"Mommy, it's me 'ily." The small girl's voice had a little trouble pronouncing the 'l' sound, but Ginny understood her to be telling her that her name was Lily.

**(A/N: dun Dun DUN!! Oh yeah, I've been planning this for a while. Now it'll be sorta confusing, but I'll think of funny ways to let you know who it is. For instance, Lily is still little, so she always have this lisp. Albus…well, that'll be easy, but he'll always be bookish and rule-following. James…man, I want to make him just like the other one…maybe I'll call him Jim. (My dad's name is James, and his dad was James, so we call my dad Jim.) (Strangely enough, if I was a boy, my name woulda been James, too.)**


	11. The Mushiest Chapter

(A/N: Last time…

**(A/N: Last time…**

_NEXT DAY_

_Ginny woke up the next morning to a startling sight in the common room. She had sorta - kinda passed out on the floor after the super party last night. She turned on the uncomfortable floor, wishing she was in her bed, mayhaps with a certain black-haired savior…_

"_GLEAM!" gleamed some light nearby. "BIG SHINEY GLEAM IN YOUR EYE-BOOGIE FILLED EYES!"_

"Gawd,"_ thought Ginny, _"Not more stupid people from the past. I just hope this time it's not Snape or Bellatrix…"

_A flash of red hair, and Ginny felt a pair of skinny arms surround her waist._

"_Mummy?"_

_Ginny's eyes popped open. "Whaaaaaaaaaat?"_

"_Mummy, it's me 'ily." The small girl's voice had a little trouble pronouncing the 'l' sound, but Ginny understood her to be telling her that her name was Lily._**)**

Ginny turned over to face the small girl, cradling her head in one hand. She hand a massive hangover, and this 'sleeping-on-the-ground' thing wasn't really helping.

"I'm sorry sweetie, but I'm not your mummy. I'm sure I help you find her, though. Do you know your mummy's name?"

The little girl stuck her bottom lip out, looked down, and swung from side to side. "B-but, 'im and A'bus an' me juss go' hew, an'…an'…" the little girl burst into tears. Without hesitation, Ginny sat up and hugged, making comforting shushing sounds.

"It's okay; it'll be okay, everything's alright…" As Ginny murmured to the eight-or-so year old girl, she looked around the room. It was filled with debris from last night's party, various sleeping partygoers, including her boyfriend and brother. Those two, in fact, seemed to be hugging in their sleep. Oh, where's a camera when you need one?

However, two figures caught her eyes. Two young boys were standing not far away, staring at her in shock. One was most definitely _another_ Potter, she could tell that much. In fact, he looked just like Harry, but younger. He had the eyes, the hair, the dimples…all that was missing was the scar. The other, however, was a Weasley. With hair like that, he had to be. But Ginny caught a flash of green through his long bangs. Harry's green…

She looked down at the little girl, now realizing how much the child looked like _her_. The hair, the shape of her face, the shape of her eyes…her eyes! They were green!

Who were these children?

Ginny stood as the small child dried her eyes with her fist, the other hand grasping Ginny's. The mysterious boys followed her as she stood with their eyes, both briefly glancing over her head, as if expecting her to be taller.

Ginny was about to speak to them when a figure on the ground started to move. Seeing it was her boyfriend, Ginny bent down once more, giggling at his position.

"Harry…get up, dear," she said in between giggles, "We have some guests, Harry."

"Fi'e mor minuts, Mrs. Weasley…"

Ginny snorted and said, "Wrong Weasley, Harry."

Harry groggily opened his eyes, smiling faintly upon seeing his girlfriend. "Mmm, well I do like this one quite a bit better…" he muttered, before grabbing the back of Ginny's head and pushing himself up for a nice morning snog.

"Ew! Mummy an' 'addy aw thissing!"

Harry broke the kiss, looking about lethargically in confusion. "What the hell…" he muttered in low voice. Ron shifted beside him, causing Harry to jump and then kick him on purpose. Ron grunted in his drunken slumber and turned to the other side, muttering something about, "Spiders…want me to tap dance…"

Harry turned to Ron, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "You tell those spiders, Ron." **(A/N: LOL, best line ever from the books. I was so glad when they put it in the fourth movie.)**

Ginny snorted once more, and helped the large boy from the ground. "Harry…we seem to have a few more guests. This is Lily…"

"But, Gin, we've already got a Lily, don't we?" he said drunkenly, "She's over…somewhere…that was once helluva party last night, I'll tell you, Gin…" he stumbled over to a couch and plopped down into a seat. "Man…I really need a hangover potion, or somthin…"

"Harry." Ginny said, finally getting his attention. "I'll take you down to the hospital wing and get you some right now if you just listen for five minutes." Her maternal instincts had kicked in, and she could tell this would be the only way to get him to cooperate. _It must be Lily,_ she thought to herself, _little kids always make me feel like a mum._

"Harry, this morning I woke up to bright flash of light, and then Lily was hugging me and calling me her mummy. These two…I don't know their names, but I think the three of them are related…"

Harry only then noticed the two boys. "Woah…" he muttered, "How old are you two?"

The older of the two, the black haired one, said, "I'm thirteen, thank you very much, and the name's James. Most people call me Jim, though."

"Really?" said Harry, starting to perk up a bit, "What's your name, then?"

The red-haired boy look up, as if startled that he had been talked to. "M-my name's Albus, sir. I'm eleven," he stated in a soft voice.

"Oh, shut up, Al. You don't have to treat them like they're professors, they're just-"

Al rounded on Jim, saying, "No! Mum told us that we should call stranger 'sir' and 'miss' if we're ever lost and-"

"Yeah, well they're not exactly strangers, are they?"

Lily tugged on Ginny's sleeve. She had been watching the boys fight with wide eyes, but now she wanted it to end. "Mummy?" Ginny bent down to her level. "Mummy, can you make 'im and A'bus thop q-q-q," she had some trouble pronouncing the 'q' sound in 'quarreling', "q-q-fighting?"

Ginny ignored the fact that the young girl had called her 'Mummy' again and smiled, "Sure. Why don't you go sit next to Harry and tell him tell you some jokes, and I'll stop them from doing any damage."

Lily grinned and flounced off to sit on the couch. "Daddy!" she cried once she had clambered her way up, "Joke time!"

Harry looked flabbergasted. "But I'm not your-"

"Just go along with it." Ginny hissed in his ear. She made her way over to the two boys, who happened to be making quite a ruckus.

"Boys," stated Ginny, interrupting some insult which Jim had been hurtling at Al. "What is going on here?" Hands on hips, she gave the two her best impersonation of her mother. The two seemed to wilt under her stern gaze, something she had seen her brothers do thousands of times.

"Nothing, Mum, honestly-"

"Alright, that's it. Enough! All three of you have some explaining to do." She grabbed them both by the sleeve and dragged them over to the couch across from Harry. His conversation with Lily became clearer as she plopped Jim and Al into their seats and took one herself on the other side of Harry.

"A guy walks into a bar. What does he say?" Harry asked Lily.

"I 'uno, what?" replied Lily, smiling.

"Ouch!" said Harry.

Lily erupted into a fit of giggles that caused her to bounce where she sat, and both boys cracked a grin.

"Alright, everybody, settle down," said Ginny, "You three are going to tell us who your parents are, what year it is, and…let's go with…your blood status. Jim, why don't you give it a go?"

Jim looked a little surprised, cleared his throat, and said, "Can I take the last on first?"

Ginny nodded affirmative.

"Alright, well, we're all a quarter muggleborn, seeing as dad is half an' mum is pure."

Ginny raised her eyebrows and traded looks with Harry. _Were these kids for real??_

"The current year is 2016."

"Bloody hell," Harry said after a second, "That's 19 years in the future!" **(A/N: Hmm, I wonder why…:P )**

"Harry, you mustn't swear around the children. Gives them bad habits, you see," Ginny said absentmindedly. "Jim, you were born in 2003, weren't you?"

He smiled slightly. "Yes, m'am." **(A/N: Pronounced with a British accent as, "Yes, 'um." Just saying. I always say my dialogue out loud, and I realized some people might say that the American way.)**

There was a moment of silence. Ginny was thinking. If these really _were_ her kids, and these really _were _the real dates…She'd only be twenty-two when James was born. _I don't think I could be a mother at 22!_ She thought, panicked, _I suppose its one of those 'learn-on-the-job' type of things…still…_

Just then Harry looked up. "Your parents…you still have them, don't you?"

At this point, Al smiled and said, "Yeah, we do. And our aunts and uncles and cousins and-"

Ginny leaped up and hugged the two boys, tears streaming from her eyes. "My boys…you're my boys…" A mother always knows, even at the tender age of 16. Lily hugged her, and Ginny even felt a strong pair of arms encircle the four of them. It was then that Ginny knew, unequivocally knew, that this was her family. She was sobbing by now, so happy and excited for the future ahead, as long as it contained these four people.

**(A/N: OMG, you guys!! Five effing pages on Word, and I still want to do more!! Writing is def. the right job for me. Sit around the house, listen to music, write and eat Tagalongs all day…dream come true! And shut up – tagalongs are way better than thin mints and you know it. Okay, bye-bye sweetums, I gotta sleep nao!)**


	12. This counts, I swear!

(A/N: WARNING: Mushy moment about to be interrupted

**(A/N: WARNING: Mushy moment about to be interrupted. If you don't like that, then sorry, I'm the authoress. That being said, there will be many more mushy moments to come. You think it's fluffy now? Just wait 'till they hafta leave…(sweat drop…)) (2****nd**** A/N: Oh, and this is kinda from Harry's POV. But still third person observer…as apposed to narrator, yes.)**

"SNORE," snored Ron. Why yes, he did happen to pick up that lovely trait from Lavender. Splendid. Now I won't have to think up half of his dialogue. "LOUD SNORE."

Harry cracked a smile. _That's so typical. Hermione certainly hit the nail on the head when she said that he had the emotional range of a teaspoon._ **(Random A/N: Okay, how messed up is it that Hermione only said half of that line in the fifth movie?? "Just because you've the emotional range of a teaspoon, Ronald…" DOESN'T MEAN WE ALL DO. (STORM AWAY). Not, "Lalalala, I think I'll just stay happy and laugh in front of the dangerously close fireplace…) (ARGH. WIZARD AGNST.)**

Harry shared a look with Ginny. She smiled. They had a deviously delightful plan. Muuuaaahahahaha.

Insert actually good plan here. Sorry, it's about eleven, and all I can some up with is Levicorpus. /

Ron yelped as he was raised swiftly into the air non-verbally. Now awake, he said angrily, "Why does this keep happening to me? **(A/N: Lol – see 6****th**** book) **Lemme dooooooooown!"

Harry chuckled in a manly manner and did, indeed, let him down. The kids roared with laughter.

"LOL," said Jim.

"OMG, Jim, that is so fifteen years ago," Al remarked exasperatly.

Landing with a thump, Ron rubbed the boogies out of his eyes…sleepily. Because that's how people do stuff when they're sleepy. They do it sleepily.

"Who…is..them…?" Ron muttered…SLEEPILY.

Ginny put on a blank expression and said, "Go to back to bed, Ron. You just totally messed up our happy-flippin'-family-moment. Nice work, moron. Only you, I swear." She shook her head disappointedly.

"Dun hafta tell me twice…night, Mummy…"

SILENCE.

Hermione, asleep in her bed, was glad that she had had the foresight to not get completely drunk off her ass the night before. Hangovers are such a drag. However, she was awakened by weeping from what sounded like downstairs. _Weeping?_ She thought groggily. She wiped the sleep from her eyes and clambered out of bed. Making her way down the stairs, her eyes fell upon the Potter children. _Whaaaat?_

Ginny noticed Hermione descend the stairs and thought to herself, _Crap. Not another one I gotta explain this to…_

**(A/N: Short, I know. Soree! Next one will be mucho better. Yes, this was a filler. Just to let you know I'm back!)**


	13. In which Ginny feels old and out of it

**(A/N: Alright, so this is one of those not-so-fun explanation chapters…but I'm hoping it will be interesting. It'll be in two parts, to make it better on my brain and to assure you all that I'm still living.**

**Just as a side note, I do actually have this fic (roughly) outlined. I have no idea how many chapters, but trust me; we're just in the beginning. Hopefully I will finish this by the end of the summer…or at least within the next couple of years. That would be great.)**

Ginny sighed. They were only halfway done with explaining this whole situation to Hermione, and already she had a hankering for some pancakes. _Damn it, _she thought to herself, _why did we have to skip breakfast to tell McGonagall about my babies?_

I mean, well, she knew the answer. Obviously, they had to find some place for the kids to hide until they could figure out how to get them all back, Harry's parents and their friends included, and…well, it was just too much for her to handle.

Most of all, though, she wanted to hear the kid's story. How had they gotten here? I mean, she knew it would be something about that they were being stupid, and playing about with Daddy's wand or something, and it was just an accident – all an accident. This, of course, was not the case at all…

Noticing a lull in the conversation, Ginny took this as a perfect time to end her reverie. Or course, upon the discovery that all eyes were on her, she could only wonder if it had not been wiser to stay in her thoughts. She sighed, knowing there was no going back now.

"Wut," she said, "What is it that I missed?" Her face was doing that weird thing people sometimes do in cartoons where their faces squish down and they gain a unibrow, usually to show boredom or indifference. Well, um anyway, she looked funky.

Harry looked a bit frightened. "Um, Hermione, you're her best friend, you tell her," he said, promptly leaving the vicinity.

"But-" Hermione tried to protest, but he had already escaped. Ginny didn't notice; too busy being creepy, or something. Hermione turned to Ginny looking a tad bit paralyzed. Or botoxed.

"Alright, sweetie, so your darling boyfriend," she looked around manically, "just left me with the task of getting you to pay attention for a second…" But Ginny was already off in LaLaLand, therefore meaning that the readers don't get to hear the rest of Hermione's statement. Lawl, I won't do that to you guys. But wouldn't that be so evil if I did? Dude, I must be a Nazi, or something, to be this evil. Cool. Well, not really, but you know. Evil can be sexy. In some circles.

"Alright, sweetie, so your darling boyfriend," she looked around manically, "just left me with the task of getting you to pay attention for a second to tell you that tomorrow we're going to visit all of our wonderful guests. Which will require us getting up at about six."

"But Hermiiiiiiiiiooooooonnneeeeeeee, I haaaaate getting up early," Ginny moaned, giving her friend the puppy eyes, "you knoooooooooow that!"

"Yes, Ginny, I do," Hermione responded with some impatience, "but just be grateful that you aren't the one waking you up. I have been stuck with such a glorious task."

"Oh…well, try to move the dumbbells away from my bed first. Ron forgot one time, and, uh, well…I think he may have lost a few too many brain cells in the process."

"Dually noted," Hermione said uneasily.

The time travelers had taken up residence in the Room of Requirement. It had made a cozy two bedroom flat for Lily and James, and by now had as many staircases and floors as the Burrow. Landing at a grand total of seven bedrooms, three bathrooms, a living room, a kitchen, and a dining room, there was space enough for all of its occupants.

And so, at seven the next morning ("Ron, couldn't you skip breakfast, just once?" "I'm a growing boy, aren't I, Hermione?") they were all ready and unwilling to visit their unlucky guests.

**(AN: O MI JEEBUS, u guyz. It's been, like 3 months since I last wrote any ff. My soul grows sucidal. It weeps tears which are wet and…wet. I just started at a new school…it's a bit confuzzling and frazzeling and lonely, so please to enjoy with the vacation. Also, I would like to thank all of my fantasmic reviewers or this story (ALMOST 60 U GUYZ) (HOMYGOD) but especially E (couldn't do anything without chu, mah sista) and to the beautifultastic Trumpetina who left THE LONGEST review in the HISTORY of REVIEWS a couple chapters ago. It was also so beautifultasic that everytime I see it my soul just lifts and I start to giggle once more. And then, I wash off my eyeliner. So thanks, sweetie. Reviews like that remind me that there are people that lurve me – somewhere. Even if they do think I'm creepy men...possibly. :P)**

**(AN2: Also, E, that last review was lametasic, in all its glory. "Yay! An update!"?? Just for that, I'm taking you out of My Five.)**

**(AN3: O WAIT MY FONE IS CINGULAR)**

**(AN4: Second part will be out soon prolly!)**


	14. The sex appeal of dirty boxers

**(AN: What kind of glory is this? An update? Please to enjoy!)**

The morning saw Lily dashing around trying desperately to clean the place up. For almost half an hour, she'd been picking up books, quills, and dirty clothes. She even tried her best to get rid of the stains already in the carpet. She had forgotten she had magic in her panic.

"But Lily," whined James, "why should we clean up for them? They're just like us; I bet their rooms are full of crap-"

"Yes, James, but one of them is our son. I wouldn't want him knowing too soon that his father is a dirty pig."

"Yeah…um, your face looks like a pig!"

Lily stopped in the middle of picking up a pile of unwashed clothing and pulled out a particularly nasty pair of boxers. "Well, if you really want these on display…"

"You know," said he, "You look pretty hot holding my unders." He got up smoothly and walked over to her sexily.

"James, is this really the time?-"

"No time like the present, babe!" He kissed her full on the mouth.

And such was the scene that the quartet stumbled upon. Lily, holding her boyfriend's sweaty and definitely stanky boxers as they totally made out. There was a silence.

"That's hoooooooooooooot!"

Sirius emerged from the staircase doing that stupid slow clap thing. You know. "Clap……clap…..clap….clap…clap..-ap-ap-ap!" Slow clap.

**(AN: Sorry, I'm so tired. I'll finish this later. This is just to whet your appetite. MOAR EEZ COMMIN!)**


	15. Conspiracy Theory

**(AN: Hey look, I didn't die! No, really though. I'm sorry I haven't been updating, but I kind of died for a loooong time. Actually, though, a couple people sent me some really nice reviews, and I was like whoaaaa, fanfiction still exists!!!! So, here I am. Let's see if I can recap, as I'm not completely sure where we are myself:**

James and Lily came back from 1970s.

They are living in the room of requirement…and they are really bad at cleaning up.

I used to write like I was on crack all the time.

**That about sums it up. Let's see how I do after the longest hiatus in forever, I swear.)**

James and Lily quickly broke apart. James looked around awkwardly, then grabbed his nasty boxers and ran to his room. Lily seemed equally surprised, but quickly recovered and proceeded to greet their guests. As she invited them in for breakfast, she shot Sirius a look that clearly said, "IMMA GO CHRIS BROWN ON YO ASS."

Lily tried to make small talk with the four students, who watched her with amusement, and perhaps a little disgust from Ron. "So, how was the trip?"

Harry was the first to respond."Oh, just fine, just up a few flights of stairs-"

"A few million flights of stairs," grumbled Ginny.

"-and here we are, ready to spend our day off with you lot! The rest of the castle is down in Hogsmeade, so we thought-"

"WAIT," Ginny seethed, "THIS IS A HOGSMEADE DAY?"

"Ginny, I told you this all yesterday," said Hermione, exasperated, "Everyone except the first and second years will be out, so we're going to get everyone together and go down to the lake, then down the kitchens for lunch. We'll be back at two at the latest, you'll have plenty of time for homework."

"HOMEWORK?" interrupted Ginny, "ME WANT SHOPPING!"

Harry hugged her gently, and said, "Shh, darling, we've already bought all your Christmas presents. What else do you need?"

She dissolved into tears, "Gloves in the window…so cute…probably gone now…that bitch Pavarti…"

Harry stroked her back, "It's alright, they'll still be there next month, and we'll go down together and have a little date, and buy you sixteen pairs of gloves."

"Really?" She said, still sniveling.

"If you want," Harry smiled down at her.

"But Harry," interrupted Ron in a high-pitched voice, "What if IIIIIII want a lovely pair of gloooooves? You nevah buy meee ana'thiiiiing!!"

"Unc'a Won?" A small face peered from the stairwell, "Why do you sound like a lady?" The little girl giggled.

"Because, daaaling," Ron continued, "I aaaaam a laaady. A beeeeaaauuutiful, gorgeouuuuus LAAADY."

The girl ran out into Ron's arms where he swung her around, sending her into screaming laughter. The two older boys looked out protectively from their hiding spot to make sure she was in no danger. As their younger parents discussed Ron's unknown talent for children (Hermione was most impressed), the two slunk back halfway up the stairs and crouched down conspiratorially.

"Can you believe them? Playing at being our parents. Who do they think they are? They're kids. Ted's older than them. We ought to find him. At least for Lily. These imposters…" The older boy checked that no one was listening, "Al, I don't think they're who they say they are. I think they might be…" Jim blinked profusely, "D-death Eaters. That's what Dad called them."

Albus looked confused. "What do you mean, Jim? Why shouldn't they be who they say they are?" Jim sighed.

"Al, don't you remember when we were really little, and Dad was still a real Auror, instead of just a stuffy old codger with a big title? - Don't give me that look, Al, you know as well as I do, he doesn't do anything cool anymore – well, anyway, when he still had real assignments, he'd always come home and talk to Mum for hours, goin' on and on about the Malfoys and some chick named Bellatrucks, or something. He always called them all the same thing – Death Eaters. And the way he said it-" The boy looked around uneasily, "Well, it can't be a good thing, can it? What kind of good guy is goes round saying, 'Oh yes, I eat death!' I bet these kids are Death Eaters. I think we're not even gone back in time."

Al had had enough at this point. "Jim, of course we've gone back in time! How could we not have?"

"How _could_ we have gone back in time is the real question. You know just as well as I do, Rose and Hugo were playing with that funny necklace, too. Where are they?"

Albus silently pulled out the necklace they'd found at Aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron's house. A small, gold hourglass on a longer-than-normal matching gold chain, it was obvious to any trained magician that the object in question was a timeturner. Unfortunately, it had fallen into the hands of some very untrained children one rainy afternoon as their parents chatted by the fire.

"Where could they be?" asked Albus quietly, breaking the silence. "When could they be?"

"I don't know," said Jim. "But we're sure as hell going to find out."

The silence that followed Jim's words was broken by soft footsteps from behind them. The swiveled around to find themselves face to face with an unsmiling Remus Lupin.

"Boys, I think it's high time you two headed downstairs, don't you? Wouldn't want to miss breakfast." The look on his face clearly said that he had heard all they had said. The boys gave him a polite smile and turned away. Their grim faces as they headed down the staircase told more of what they were feeling: anger, doubt, and just maybe, a little bit of fear.

**(A/N: Just so you kiddies know, I do not know just when the next update will be. However, I have mapped out the final chapters, and I can tell you that there will be a whopping 20 chapters. What's this? I actually have a plan? That's certainly not how I started this fic. Seriously, it used to be me in eighth grade sitting at my computer at midnight, literally writing whatever came to my head first, regardless of quality. Anyhow. I will be sad to end my first multi-chapter story, but also happy. It's been a while, and my writing style has changed. I'd like to finish up my old projects, and start on a completely new one, for my own enjoyment. For those of you who chose to ride out the rest of this story, I hope you enjoy it!)**


	16. The Future, once again

When Rose and Hugo recovered from the flash of light and noticed their cousins missing, they knew they were in serious trouble. Because you can seriously not notice that there were five people in a room, and now there are two. The silings looked at each other with wide eyes.

"Rose, it's bad when people go away and you don't see it, right?" Hugo, the younger of the two asked his sister.

"Hugo, I think this is really, really, horribly bad. What if we never find them? What if they never come backwhatiftheychangesomething-" However at this point her ranting was cut off by the sounds of heavy heels clunking up the stairs leading to the office.

Hugo smiled, "Mum can fix this. Mum can fix anyfing!"

"No, Hue, Mum can't know about this. Da can't know. Uncle Harry and Auntie Ginny can't know." She gulped. "Especially Auntie and Uncle can't know." He looked confused. "We just lost their children in the space-time continuum, Hugo!"

"Well, thanks for clearing that up, Rose, that's a very clever explanation as to your cousins' whereabouts. But really, where are they?" The two children looked up to see their Auntie and Mum had snuck into the room without them seeing. The former, the speaker, seemed amused, but the latter seemed annoyed and tired. The children remained silent.

"Well," said Auntie loudly, "Looks like Al and Jim and Lily will have to go to bed in the continu-whatsit without their dessert," clearly expecting the three to answer her.

"They're not here," murmured Rose.

"Well, then, tell them to get out soon. I have a raging headache, your father's talking about Quidditch, and we both have to go to work in the morning. You'll see your cousins tomorrow at your Grandma Weasley's, so just go get them, and let's get downstairs. We're leaving in a half-hour, at the latest!" Mum grumbled as she walked out the door, rubbing her temples with one hand.

Auntie got down on the kid's level. "I know you two know where they are. Tell them when they get done exploring space that I'm serious about their dessert." She winked and got up to leave. "Oh, and you two know you aren't supposed to be in your Uncle's office. I let you off this time, but don't test me." She yelled, meaning to be heard by her own children, "Just ask Jimmy!" She smiled one last time before all that was left her was the sound of heels clumping down the stairs once more.

After a moment of silent, Rose exhaled shakily and muttered, "We're doomed."

"No," replied Hugo, "_They're_ doomed when they get back.


End file.
